A successful day was as simple as getting up and showering before 2pm. <\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

Some of my episodes were worse than others. My \u201cbetter\u201d days consisted of me going through the motions of life. I appeared to be normal and happy, but I wasn\u2019t motivated too much beyond going to school and work. I put on a brave face but I felt hopeless most of the time.

During my worst episodes (which usually lasted a few months) I felt completely hopeless, developed insomnia, had little to no appetite, and had weekly anxiety attacks that caused me to hyperventilate and shake. I would call out of work frequently when this happened because I couldn\u2019t handle the added stress or couldn\u2019t muster up enough strength to put on my \u201chappy\u201d face. Those episodes were filled with days where I felt too weak to get out of the bed. A successful day was as simple as getting up and showering before 2pm. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Depression is complex and it\u2019s not something you can \u201csnap\u201d out of. Most of my friends didn\u2019t understand what I was going through and that made me hide (try to) my illness even more. The last thing I needed was someone telling me that it was in my head or making me feel ashamed and weak. I was doing enough of that on my own. I didn\u2019t want to feel that way. It\u2019s awful to not have control over your thoughts and feelings, even when you\u2019re trying your best. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Share a story where your diagnosis\/symptoms significantly impacted your life.<\/strong> <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Summer of 2014 was the worst episode I\u2019d ever had. I remember having to quit my job and move back home. I was so depressed I couldn\u2019t go into work without breaking down. For about two months, it was really hard to do anything. I stayed in the bed until late afternoon and binged watched Netflix to try to distract myself from the negative thoughts that consumed my mind. I tried to sleep but couldn\u2019t because my mind wouldn\u2019t shut off. I cried A LOT that summer, but I developed a habit of praying a lot too. That was one thing that helped me overcome. Honestly, at first I struggled to believe most of the things I was reading and praying, but it got easier to after a while. That season was when I stopped trying to be perfect and put together and just let myself be. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
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It\u2019s my belief that mental illness makes us stronger, not weaker. How have you seen yourself grow because (or in spite of) your mental illness? <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n
Absolutely. My battle with depression and anxiety taught me how to fight for the life and health that I want. I learned about myself – emotional wounds, triggers, and capacity. I realized it\u2019s okay to need more breaks or not have the same capacity as others. What I need to do for myself doesn\u2019t make me less than, it makes me self-aware and that leads to a healthier mind and body. Though I had some very dark days, I\u2019ll still here<\/strong>. I wanted to give up but I never did. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
It\u2019s also helped me become more compassionate to the other people\u2019s struggles. We\u2019re all doing the best we can. Lastly, it strengthened my faith in God. It\u2019s true what the Bible says, that God is close the brokenhearted. I met God in an entirely new way. He gave me hope and purpose when I had none. I will always remember how I felt during those years, and I will share my story with boldness in hope that someone else will find the courage to keep going.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
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Counselor reaction:<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n
General comments or reactions:<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n
To this person: you have such an enlightening approach to your illness. It is obvious that you have struggled with depression for an extended period of time because of all of the progress you have made in accepting and working with your diagnosis. Something I always explained to my kiddos when working with them was that depression is not like the chicken pox; you do not go through a depressive episode once and then it\u2019s done. Depression is something that you live with and you could have an episode weekly, monthly, or you could go 5 years between having an episode. There\u2019s no way of knowing when it can come back, and there\u2019s no way of preventing it, but you have found ways to cope with that uncertainty, and that is truly so very strong and introspective of you. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
How can friends and family support someone who suffers from depression?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n
I think the biggest thing is just to be understanding. When I say understanding, I don\u2019t mean baby someone and make them feel reliant upon your support. I don\u2019t mean push them away. I don\u2019t mean pretend that nothing is wrong. Understand that some days will be harder than others. Understand that someone does not choose to have roller coaster moods and emotions. Ask them what they need. If they tell you to go away, that doesn\u2019t mean they don\u2019t like you or want you around, they just need the time to focus on themselves. Someone suffering through a depressive episode may need different things throughout different episodes, and so listening to what they need is so imperative!<\/p>\n\n\n